Agnes and the Hitman by Jennifer Crusie and Bob Mayer
For a fun poolside read, this one can’t be beat. Warning- I’m going to talk about the plot of the book, so if you don’t want to know, don’t read ahead.
Crusie and Mayer’s whimsical cast of Mobster characters provides fodder for hilarity and suspense by themselves, not to mention the main character, Cranky Agnes, an undecidedly non-mobster who finds herself afloat in 25 years of “family” business coming to a head when she unwittingly purchases a mansion from one of the brother’s widows- or is she? Since no one’s ever found the body, this is a topic of consternation.
Aside from the body, they’re also missing a cool $5 million, someone is trying to dog-nap Agnes’ lovable mutt, a pair of flamingos is on the loose, and Agnes is in real danger of being thrown in jail if she whacks one more person with her cast-iron pan.
Add a cast of Frankies, Joeys, Brendas, Marias and and a family whose male members all go by the names Two-Wheels, Three-Wheels, Four-Wheels, and so on (my only gripe with the wholly unoriginal New Jersey Italian mob names being that there weren’t a couple Vinnys in the mix. Or maybe I just missed him among all the name changes and long-lost relatives resurfacing. Well crap. Sorry Vinny.)
Did I mention that they’re supposed to be throwing a wedding, too- during which at least one hired killer will be in attendance, and needless to say folks, he’s not there for Agnes’ much worried over wedding cake.
As the bodies start piling up, thanks to the handiwork of the smoldering Shane and his band o’ contract killers (but not the ones who will be attending the wedding- these are OTHER hired killers- because when you stumble across one, there’s usually a couple in hot pursuit, apparently). Speaking of smoldering, ladies- Shane is, and he’s gotten Cranky Agnes all riled up. You won’t be disappointed by the ensuing – ummmm…..You won’t be disappointed.
As far as pairings go, Crusie and Mayer are one to watch. They’ve got another book out which I may just pick up one of these days. They write seamlessly – though a collaborative effort, you’d be hard-pressed to tell who wrote what. The wording is descriptive without being showy, letting you picture the scenes as they’re happening, but not carving out so much detail that it leaves nothing to the imagination.
A book club pick? Probably not- this one’s not going to be inspiring deep conversation anytime soon.
A fun read from two writers I’m going to be keeping an eye on? Definitely. I bought it for $5.98 – so head on over to your local book hawker and see if you can get your hands on Agnes (and Shane) for the same.
Just Can't Stop Reading 